#LET’S SEE SOME STEPS TO ESCAPE FROM A TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS……..
1. You are afraid of being alone:
If you have come to believe that it is better to be in an unhealthy relationship than to be alone, then you are setting yourself up for some heartache. I get it; we’ve all been socialized to fear “dying alone.” In actuality, the odds are very low that the loss of one relationship will result in us being completely alone forever. Even if it did, it is truly better to be alone with yourself and build or maintain your relationship with yourself than it is to be with someone who makes you feel lonely by not understanding, respecting, or prioritizing you.Our “relationship status” in one aspect can also impact how confident we feel to let go of another: if we don’t have close friendships or working relationships, the idea of leaving our romantic partner feels more overwhelming, and vice versa. The reality is that losing one interpersonal relationship will not render us solitary, but it can feel that way. Sometimes, we can begin to feel that this person is all we have; usually, because we have made that person a priority, whether consciously or not. We’ve spent less time with our friends because we’re in a relationship, or we’ve focused more energy on one friendship than our others, or we’ve built our lives around our jobs.
2. It is difficult for you to confront and set boundaries:This one can be especially tricky in workplace relationships, where there may be office policies in place and office politics at play. Having an amicable working relationship can make a difference in your entire work environment, and your work is how you clothe, feed and shelter yourself. If you run your own business with another person, the process of separating could be convoluted and emotional, with peoples’ investment and income on the line. This can lead to “going along to get along,” letting comments or late reports slide, feeling overworked, and/or feeling underappreciated.In relationships in our personal lives, there are various reasons why confronting and setting boundaries is difficult. This can be because we are in the habit of people-pleasing, or because we haven’t been supported in our boundaries in the past. We may have been raised in a household without them or involved in activities as a young person that forced us to push past them, such as competitive sports. It can feel difficult to walk away from a situation that doesn’t serve us if we struggle to stick to our guns. We might worry that we’ll take that person back or be enticed back into our job with the promise of increased income or a more flexible schedule. At that point, we will have unsettled an entire aspect of our lives “for no reason.”
3. You make negative conclusions about yourself, your life, and the future:
If you have spent the past seven years in a romantic relationship, hearing horror stories from your friends about their dating lives, you might worry about jumping into that pool. If your partner has said and done things that displayed a lack of a woman sitting on a rock looking out over a city arppreciation for you, you might think that all partners will see and treat you the same way. “I am never going to find anyone,” or “I am always going to be alone,” or “I always find the wrong person to be in a relationship with.” When the stakes are high, it’s difficult to remember that you are an individual person at a particular time; the person who is right for you may also be recently single or wouldn’t have been your friend’s type.Perhaps you compare yourself to others you know, who have had lifelong friendships, and feel like you’re not as good at making friends as they are. You worry about letting go of this friend, and the prospect of making a new friend seems daunting. Maybe you don’t trust your instincts about people after a string of life changes led to several short friendships in a row. “I don’t trust myself to hang out with the right person.” It is important to understand that as we grow and develop, our lives do, too. Friendships have to have common ground: hobbies, schedules, goals, priorities. In your early twenties, your plans and schedule will be different than your early thirties, forties, fifties, and so on.
4. Seek Out a Therapist:
Speaking to a therapist or counselor about your situation and decision to leave is one of the first steps you should take. According to Hardy, “Depending on the extent of toxicity, safety planning may be a critical step in the process of exiting the relationship. A professional can often guide you through resources, and help you navigate questions or concerns you have about your decision.”
5. Work on Your Self-Esteem…
Hardy explains that toxic relationships can negatively impact our personal belief systems—”whether it’s how we view ourselves, confidence, self-esteem, or our overall views on life”—so doing the inner work will push you in the right direction towards leaving your unhealthy relationship. “A professional can help identify negative thoughts and provide the tools to reframe cognitive distortions,” he continues.
CONCLUSION- please try to resolve your problem, with your calm mind. But if you are right then go forward without any comparison.
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